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Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the
following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He
just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of ?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and
everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then
they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other

1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more t han other
people's moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that
other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess
would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married

1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook?
Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to
drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And
my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking
cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because
dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the
stuff under the be d.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more
to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go
to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the
real power 'cause that's who you g ot to ask if you
want to sleep over at your friend's.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I
think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet - you know, her hair. I'd diet maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what
would it be?

1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room
clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was
my sister who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible
eyes on the back of her head.